Comments on: Guilty Pleasures: Mary has Typhoid http://www.seattlepatriot.com/2007/08/02/guilty-pleasures-mary-has-typhoid/ Laura's Home on the Internet Fri, 09 Jan 2009 22:05:43 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3.1 By: Ben http://www.seattlepatriot.com/2007/08/02/guilty-pleasures-mary-has-typhoid/comment-page-1/#comment-47 Ben Fri, 03 Aug 2007 23:59:56 +0000 http://www.seattlepatriot.com/2007/08/02/guilty-pleasures-mary-has-typhoid/#comment-47 The wagon party naming process isn't nearly as arbitrary as you make it sound. There are very specific, well-defined and widely recognized rules. The first name must always be your name, or a well-known alias. The second name is your best friend. Ideally, he will be seated next to you, so that he can marvel at your skill and lament his repeated injuries. The game randomly selects one of you as the hunter. If you fail to kill any animals, it is because your friend was hunting and he doesn't know how to shoot. He should be blamed whenever this situation arises. The third name is reserved for another friend, if possible, or the teacher, if you have no other friends. If you were forced to use the teacher's name already, you may enter the principal's name instead. Be careful. If anything bad happens to this person, you may be subjected to disciplinary action, up to and including expulsion. The fourth name is a fictional construct, suitable for a witty or off-color limerick on a gravestone. Alternatively, you may input the name of your most hated enemy. This party member must not survive the journey. If they become ill, cut the rations and double the pace. The fifth name is reserved for your secret crush. If anything bad happens to her, you must immediately restart the game, and there's an excellent chance that the two of you will never be together. However, if the thief comes in the night and steals her sets of clothing, this bodes well for the future of your relationship. The wagon party naming process isn’t nearly as arbitrary as you make it sound. There are very specific, well-defined and widely recognized rules.

The first name must always be your name, or a well-known alias.

The second name is your best friend. Ideally, he will be seated next to you, so that he can marvel at your skill and lament his repeated injuries. The game randomly selects one of you as the hunter. If you fail to kill any animals, it is because your friend was hunting and he doesn’t know how to shoot. He should be blamed whenever this situation arises.

The third name is reserved for another friend, if possible, or the teacher, if you have no other friends. If you were forced to use the teacher’s name already, you may enter the principal’s name instead. Be careful. If anything bad happens to this person, you may be subjected to disciplinary action, up to and including expulsion.

The fourth name is a fictional construct, suitable for a witty or off-color limerick on a gravestone. Alternatively, you may input the name of your most hated enemy. This party member must not survive the journey. If they become ill, cut the rations and double the pace.

The fifth name is reserved for your secret crush. If anything bad happens to her, you must immediately restart the game, and there’s an excellent chance that the two of you will never be together. However, if the thief comes in the night and steals her sets of clothing, this bodes well for the future of your relationship.

]]> By: Laura http://www.seattlepatriot.com/2007/08/02/guilty-pleasures-mary-has-typhoid/comment-page-1/#comment-46 Laura Fri, 03 Aug 2007 14:33:37 +0000 http://www.seattlepatriot.com/2007/08/02/guilty-pleasures-mary-has-typhoid/#comment-46 HA! Awesome!! HA! Awesome!!

]]> By: scottyg http://www.seattlepatriot.com/2007/08/02/guilty-pleasures-mary-has-typhoid/comment-page-1/#comment-45 scottyg Fri, 03 Aug 2007 04:21:25 +0000 http://www.seattlepatriot.com/2007/08/02/guilty-pleasures-mary-has-typhoid/#comment-45 http://www.bustedtees.com/shirt/dysentery 'Nuf said. http://www.bustedtees.com/shirt/dysentery

‘Nuf said.

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